Get all 7 MC Crumbsnatcher releases available on Bandcamp and save 25%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Masturbator of Ceremonies, Da Lick (Freaknasty - Da Dip Cover), Gay Sexxxmas, Things That Go Hump In the Night, Shartpop, The Second Crumbing, and All You Remixers Can Remix My Remix.
1. |
EGGNOG
04:27
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I'll fuck you underneath the tree, boy
Oh woah oh
You know I've got a little present
And it's waiting for you
What you got down there for me, boy?
Oh whoa oh
I can't wait to see just what them ornaments can do
Come sing a carol just for me boy
oh whoa oh
It's gonna be a holy night when I'm inside of your pants
No grinch can take your ass from me, boy
Oh whoa oh
Cuz it's a Merry Christmas with my Eggnog all in your ass
Oh ah oooooohhhh
Make the yuletide gay? Bitch it already is!
I’m sliding motha fuckin candy canes all up in ya lips
You betta get down and strip
Boy grab them pants and unzip
Baby just show me that poinsettia and give me a sniff
Yo why’s your tree in drag? Yo that ho’s wearing a skirt
But that’s okay cuz that’s exactly where ah immuna squirt
Just lay back unpack relax and open wide
I gotta honey baked ham for you to taste tonight
You give me fa la la la la la latio
But when you lick up on my balls you gotta take off the bow
I got five golden cock rings of silver and gold
Oh and my pubic hair is braided with some mistletoe ho
CHORUS
I saw ya mommy fisting Santa Claus and got an idea
I thought that i could shoot some Christmas magic up in ya rear
Oh do you hear what I hear?
It goes pah rup pum pum pum
But it ain't no drummer boy it’s just the sound of my cum
It’s raining down on ya bum
It’s that addictive shit
Cuz when you start to lick my pole ya tongue just sticks to it
I’m on ya Christmas list
Right next to peace on earth
They call my dick abominable cuz of all the girth
I’ll fuck ya under fir
Yo its favorite tree
Because it’s where I unwrap your ass
On Christmas eve
CHORUS
Don we now our gay apparel
It’s a jack strap bitch
I had to burn that wooly sweater
Cuz it’s chafin my nips
Oh and it’s making me itch
Hey baby gimme a scratch
You’re lookin like the kinda present
That I’d like to unwrap
Ey lemme give it a tap
Ey lemme give it a taste
Come on now baby stick that peppermint all up in my face
Im gonna soak it in glaze
And since you nicely asked
I got a partridge in a pear tree to shove up your ass
CHORUS
Why you ain’t tell me you were Jewish, bitch?
That’s okay too!
I’ll spin ya dreidel till ya yarmulke falls off of ya boo
We finna light the menorah
What’s your Hannukah wish?
Mine’s for that CIRCUMCISED WIENER
To get up in my lips
Just call me sonic the hedgehog
When I take off my belt
Cuz when I hit it hard your ass explodes with Hannukah gelt!
Oh boy I’m making melt
Your’e all like Oy Gevalt!
But I can’t hear ya right
Cuz you still got my challah in ya mouth
CHALLLAHHHH!!!
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2. |
Sodomize An Elf
03:58
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Ooh I wanna sodomize an elf this Christmas
Ooh I wanna stick it in an elf this year
Ooh I wanna sodomize an elf this Christmas
Stuff his little stocking with some Christmas cheer
Hey there little shawty
You’re like three foot two
Oh and I wanna stick my whole dick right inside of you
Come on make me a little present
Come on make it SAWEET
And then I’m gonna come and fill ya booty up with my meat
You wanna see the north pole?
bitch I’ll drop my pants
I’munna dash and dance and prance right
Up into your ass
I might be on the naughty list
But if ya give me a chance
On Christmas eve I’ll let ya play with my baseball bat
Come on and lick my sugar cookies
Let’s go roll in the snow
I’m squirtin tinsel on ya branches
Like a ho ho ho
Oh I might be a fruitcake
but if the mood is right
I’mmuna eat ya ass till you say
“It's a wonderful life”
CHORUS
Oh them tiny Pointy ears make me harder than fuck
I wanna Take my PJs off and cram it into ya butt
You look so little and cute
You’re like a Christmas twink
I wanna put a mitten on my Dick'n
Ruin ya pink
I heard the stockings were hung
well so the fuck am i
and imma stick my Ding dong merrily
between ya elf thighs
I’m lookin into ya eyes
While you just sit there and spin
you betta duck before I bust or else
“You’ll shoot your eye out kid”
CHORUS
Yo is that jack frost nibblin on the tip of ya nose
Or did santa come and dribble it all up on ya clothes
Ya puttin garland on the trees with little red and green lights
But baby It’s gon be a white ass Christmas tonight
Oh imma bust on ya wreath
Immuna sled right in
You think that santa’s sack is magic?
Look what I’M packin
I got a big ass yule log
That’s tryna get lit
And I’mma dip my marshmallows in ya hot chocolate
Take off that Christmas sweater baby
And them earmuffs too
I got a reindeer and he wanna land inside of you
Oh and the three wise men left me a yelp review
They said
"You want that dick for Christmas? Bring some poppers and some lube"
Woooo!
CHORUS
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3. |
Krampussy
04:21
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OH SHIT!!!
You betta watch out bitch
Cuz yo stupid little ass is on my naughty list
SOMEONE HELP!
You better run and hide
Cuz imma beatcho ass up with a branch tonight
nooo it hurts!
Fuck yo Christmas cheer!
I came to turn your little ass into a Christmas queer
RUN IT’S KRAMPUS!
Nah, bitch
I’m krampussy!
like Krampus, but fabulous
First things first
Lemme tell you something
I’m not KRAMPUS!
nah! That bitch ain’t nuttin
He’s a creep! And I mean it in the worst of ways
He’s so weirdly obsessed with how kids behave
I don’t give two shits if you’re acting bad
Frankly, fuck your mom and dad
The thing that I’M tryna do holds a lot more weight
I'm gonna put an end to all these god damn straights
It’s always football this and eat pussy that
“Let’s have a kid and then listen to nickleback”
Bleugh! Gross! You’re making me SICK
And I’m gonna fix the problem with a swat of my stick
You wanna make it through the night without me beating your ass?
Well then put on some lady gaga and gayer fast
CHORUS
Ooh what are you wearing?
And don’t call me bro
Them ugly ass khakis have got to go
Your breath smells like shit
Is that beer in your hand?
You better drop it and replace it a vodka cran
Im bouta sharpen my horns
And kick ya ass with my hoof
If you don’t learn how to vogue
You gon be missin a tooth
if you say live laugh love to me one more time
im bout to drop this damn branch and blast yo ass a nine
I’ll fist bump you little breeders straight to hell
And imma send yo car magazines with you as well
You got diarrhea streaks on your chonies and balls
and you’re borng as shit and that’s the biggest sin of all
CHORUS
I got a sister
(oooh and shes a mean old dyke!)
her name is menstrual krampuss
(And she gon gitchoo tonight)
She’s in charge of the ladies
But before she’s through
She gonna make sure that you all become some lesbians too
You better trade in them heels for some birkenstocks
Better burn that burn bra and learn to like the box
You better grow your armpit hair real long
Or she gon chop yo ass up by the end of this song
Throw that knife away! You need a butcher knife
Throw that life away! you need a butcher life!
Throw that man away! You need to getchoo a wife!
and sing the indigo girl girls while you look in her eyes
You better trade that lipstick for some lip balm bitch
And make sure it’s some unscented organic shit
And if she catch yo ass again up in that girly attire
She gon roast you like a chestnut on a open fire
CHORUS
you never seen drag race?
HIT EM WITH A BRANCH
Got some firm hard wrists?
HIT EM WITH A BRANCH
You never heard of Beyonce?
HIT EM WITH A BRANCH
Ooh they lucky that I don’t kill they stupid ass!
You wear socks with sandals?
HIT EM WITH A BRANCH!
you don’t want cha cha heels for Christmas?
HIT EM WITH A BRANCH
You don’t own nothing with sequins?
HIT EM WITH A BRANCH
I’M IMMA TAKE YO ASS TO HELL AND WE GON GO THERE FAST!
CHORUS
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4. |
Eat my ChristmASS
03:28
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Come on now sllllluuurrrrrpppp
And lick it from the back
From the top of my crack to my Christmas sack
Just blalalalla
Eat my asshole out
Sing a carol in my hole when you put it on ya mouth I’m like
Uhhhhh
I gotcho Christmas cheer
it’s the feeling that I get when ya lickin on my rear
so lick lick lick
have a merry Christmas?
Hell no mutha fucka
Just eat my christmASS
I’m bent over next to the fireplace
With my asshole out
So I can sit on ya face
It’s got a holiday flavor
It's like orange and clove
And if you lick it right I’ll leave some cinnamon on ya nose
Its not a brown paper package
Ain't tied up with a string
But when you eat my ass out it’s my favorite thing
You gonna make me sing
I be like
Ahhh HARK!
(That’s Harold Angel for hang on a minute
Immuna fart)
But you could come back boo
Get a taste of these
I wiped em with some wrapping paper
So get back on ya knees
You got an anus to please
I know you like what you see
And tis the season
So it’s better to just give than receive
CHORUS
I got ten lords a leapin just to lick this hole
And 8 maids that milk me when they reach around oohh
I’m in my gingerbread house and I’m naked as fuck
Countin on my advent calendar when you gon lick my butt
I wrote a letter to santa and I read like this:
All I want for Christmas is a rim job bitch
Get your red ass down here boy and gimme a lick
Before I show mrs claus your grindr pics
Nevermind – keep that tongue the fuck away from me
I heard a rumor that yo ass got an STD
It’s worse than gonhorrea, crabs, yeah and even the clap
I heard you got a bah humbug and I don’t fuck with that
You need to take your scrooge ass to the clinic now
Get a sugar plum shot so you can chow the fuck down
Gimme that tongue from the floor to the roof of the house
till not a creature is stirring ooh except for ya mouth
CHORUS
Twas the night before xmas
When ya sucked my shit
You were spelunkin my chimney
Like there were presents in it
I was like
Sleigh Santa!
Yeah ya wish came true
Cuz all the restaurants are closed except for Chinese food
And since my anus is empty
You can go real deep
But hurry up I got got some mapo tofu waitin for me
oooh and some christmas cookies
Ooh and some cocoa too
Actually nevermind, just keep on lickin
fuck all the food
We ain’t on 34th street but it’s a miracle still
The way your slimy little tongue makes my asshole feel
It makes me bite on my lips when you slurp on my buns
And when I cum I be like
God bless us every one!
CHORUS
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5. |
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Ho ho ho
Santa please
We both know the only ho up in this house is me
You can’t say I’m not a good boy
And I won't disagree
But I don’t need your presents bitch
I get dick for free
I fuck under the tree
And I don’t need ya mistletoe
All that I need is an elf and a bottle of lube yo
I’m doing it real slow
I’m jingling balls
Come to my place this holiday
I’m dickin the halls
All I want for xmas is to fuck hella bitches
Could be large or small
Ya could be short or tall
All I want for xmas is to fuck hella bitches
Could be skinny or fat
Don’t get give a fuck about that
All I want for Christmas is to fuck hella bitches
Could be black or white
Just ride the dick all night
All I want for Christmas is to fuck hella bitches
Cuz it’s colder in the winter
Need a bootyhole to enter
Santa baby this December please remember
Fuck
On the first day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
The rights to his anal virginity
Oh he said fuck a santa claus
Just cum in my chimney
And I said keep ya cookies out
And some milk too baby
I left him redder than Rudolphs nose
Busted a snowflake on his bitch ass clothes
Let santa watch us from the window
Cuz mr kringle wants my pringle can
Nutcracking thats the plan
Eat it like a candied yam
Fuck my way to Bethlehem
CHORUS
Oh cum all ye faithful?
Come ya ass to daddy
Call my dick st nick
Cuz I’m sportin a fatty
Why ya getting mad at me
I’m just giving ya gifts
And leave ya walkin with a limp oh just like little tiny tim
I be like marley and marley
Gonna rattle ya chains
I Rock ya head back and forth
While ya giving me brain
I’m gonna put you in pain
You gon be countin them sheep
And give you visions of my sugar plum when you go to sleep
CHORUS
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